Part 32: Update -XXVIII- Reynn celebrates while hundreds die

Update 28 Highlights - World of Final Fantasy


Chaos is putting it lightly.



Right, but where are they? Rrrgh, we need more intel!

Oh! For that the-kind of stuff, you should definitely consult with Serafie. Hang on while I go and the-get her!

Excuse me? Why should we ask her?

*Tama poofs away to go and fetch Serafie*



Rumor Radar?

Oh, that's my secret power, hon. It lets me instantly snap up every bit of gossip within my threshold. In a teensy world like this, that basically only amounts to everything.

You can do that?! Why are we only hearing about this now?!

Whoa, now that's cool.

Huh? Is it cool?

Well, I'm no expert, but I'd say it is!

Wooo-hooo. I thought I'd never be one of those cool pixies.

Well, you'd be the-cooler if you picked up facts instead of rumors.

Thanks for that reminder.

Uh, well... So do you mind trying it?

Yeah, sure. I guess I'll start us out by narrowing down the search to those Cogna we're after. Sound good?



Son of a... ugh... Okay, so using Serafie's (until now, unheard of) power, we can look into a few areas of interest to see what's happening on the ground. I don't know why it breaks it up like this and makes you select each one individually, since you can't back out of this screen until you've read everything.

Whatever. Let's have a look and see what kind of carnage is going on down below.

Update 28 Highlights - A small taste of Serafie being annoying
Here's the latest.

Oh, and due to the fact you have to select each of them individually, you'll hear Serafie repeat this line every time.



Anyway, Rumor Radar. Apparently there is some kind of four-legged machine heading for Cornelia. Warrior of Light and Lightning seem to be strategizing ways to stop it.

There you have it.



Some kind of creepy machine is attacking Nibelheim, although we have no indication what kind of creepy machine it is.

Also, apparently Cloud and Tifa do interact in this game (for a few seconds anyway). Huh. Guess I remembered incorrectly.



Figaro seems to be getting swamped by multiple weaker monsters as opposed to one big dude. They also seem to be going at it alone, since none of the League of S are mentioned.



The Phantom Train has reappeared in Tometown and is... creeping out the citizens? Doesn't sound like it's doing any damage, just spooking people.

Still, we missed out on Suplexing it because of Reynn spacing out. We must get revenge.



Finally, there's some kind of flying machine down in Besaid that's doing eagle dives on people. That actually seems fairly mundane compared to what we're hearing from other locations.



Tiiime... I command you to stop! Okay, can we just build a time machine or something?

Give them a second. They'll get it soon enough.

Inside Nine Wood Hills, you do realize that time is essentially stopped?

Oh! Wait. That girl behind the door in Nine Wood Hills-- couldn't she help us reach everyone?

There it is.

You're right! Inside her room, we can skip around to any point in time that we want!



We're automatically dumped outside Anamika's room once the scene ends. We're also informed that the airship is available for use.

To board the airship, all you the-have to do is press the command shown on the World Map.



About time. Forget this helping people nonsense, let's cruise the skies!

Update 28 Highlights - Quick Airship Example
Final Fantasy Music: Airship Themes


I know, it's exciting. But don't forget that if we want to help everyone, we have to use that door in Nine Wood Hills.

Don't worry about it, Sis. We know the clock's ticking.

Unfortunately for everyone currently in trouble, Reynn said "if we want to help". That gives us an out that I have every intention of using.



When you are on the destination selection part of the travel option, you can press X/Square/whatever the left face button is to pilot the airship. The screen doesn't move, so it can sometimes be kind of tricky to navigate with it.

By the way, if you go back to the interior of the airship, there is a Jiant accessible chest with a mega phoenix in it.



Unfortunately for us, the airship is kind of a disappointment. There are no secret locations that you can land in (except in a Maxima specific quest) and the only things to discover are some Level 60 Murkrifts scattered around the map. They are composed of about 6 normal enemies in pairs of 2 (Fritt, Zapt, and Bablizz pairs will be accompanying the different groups). They give good EXP (a little over 100k each), but they aren't repeatable so their main purpose is to get the "Clear all Murkrifts" trophy/achievement.

Other than that, you can just tool around and admire the whole map of Grymoire, which is currently dark and dreary due to the fantasy nuking that Ultima Weapon pulled.



Some things of note happened while I was clearing out the Murkrifts, though. So I guess the airship wasn't a complete loss.

Piplup gives us our first look at a Mastered Board. When you manage to activate every space on a Mirage's board, you get to choose a Mastery bonus. These are fairly significant boosts or attacks. It's a nice reward for sticking with certain Mirages for a long time. I'll need to make use of this starting soon, because we're nearing the endgame and I need to focus on a specific set of Mirages from the ones we've nicknamed in order to make sure they're ready.



Dualizard unlocks the middle evolution between it and Tiamat.



And here's Tiamat herself, that we couldn't catch back in Crystal Tower.



OMG! JC! can become a King Bomb.



Or a Bombino.



We can get Kraken if we wanted, which has a description that does the lore work for me.



Brothertaur can become a Minotaur. I also rename Brothertaur and Sistertaur to Lannataur and Reynnataur.

Minotaurs are a fairly common enemy in the series. They even get to appear as a summon in VIII.



Anyway, now is a good time to stop by Chocolatte and grab more of those Eldboxes. The Cogna are a machine race, which means we're going to need a decent supply of these if we want to imprism any of them.

With that done and the airship having been a let down, I guess we can go ahead and help save some people from being exploded or assimilated or soul harvested. I'm a little unclear on what the Cogna are supposed to be doing at the moment besides causing chaos.



Going to Anamika and selecting "Intervene" like we do for the Intervention Quests will give us a list of five special quests called "The Five Cogna Lords". Two of these are only starting points though, so the actual number of story quests we need to do is a bit higher than that.

We're going to tackle these in reverse order, starting at Besaid and working our way back to where our journey began. Part of this is so we can get Shantotto's appearance out of the way as quickly as possible.

There are a few other Intervention quests open now as well (it's been kind of dry the past couple of chapters), but we'll look at those in the next Lil' Update.

Update 28 Highlights - PK still hates Shantotto


Ugh, I thought I was done with you.

I agree that that thing's buzz is super annoying, but it's also really dangerous.

Right. We've been lucky, but some towns have suffered great damage, thanks to the explosives that Cogna drops from the air.

Explosives, you say? And how are they made?



A new kind of magic, eh? You don't say... You there, the jock with the gills of a flounder.

Huh? Wha? You mean me?

See another jock here?

Oh, c'mon, doc. You could call me by my--

Think I care about your name? Surely you jest. Now get out there and capture that annoying pest.

Huh?

Oh, use that thing from the game you play... The silly water ballet.

You mean blitzball!



I'll be waiting over in my laboratory. Now-- chop-chop, my dear!

Uh... yes ma'am!



That'd be awesome. Thank you.

Update 28 Highlights - Stupid Mini Game #1


Remember way back when I was in the Twins' Room and talking about the little game system that acts as the Gallery? There was a section called Mini Games that was all blank at the time. Well, now we start unlocking those mini games.

The minigames will not be fun...



This is one of the better ones, although it still has some frustrating aspects. This is the quest version, so all you need to do is hit that single Cogna one time, which can be accomplished by just waiting for it to get right on top of you and belting it.

In the actual mini game where you are trying to rack up points, multiple Cogna will be approaching you and you get more points the farther away you can hit them. However, the shots are subject to gravity and will therefore drop off the farther they have to travel. The power bar also moves up and down way too fast and you commit to the shot when you choose the power.

So basically, the mini game involves watching moving targets while also watching trajectory and power in order to judge the perfect moment to launch a shot while keeping in mind that your shots will arc. And the game ends if you miss three times. Fun stuff. If you're curious, all you get for getting a high score in the actual mini game is a trophy/achievement.

Thankfully I am not someone who gives a damn about trophies/achievements, so this mini game has seen its only moment in the sun.





Of course, we still have to fight the thing after knocking it out of the sky.

Update 28 Highlights - I miss Einhänder
I'll go look for a giant bottle of bug the-spray!

Somehow, I don't think bug spray is gonna be much help this time...



It's actually fairly tough. The difficulty starts to spike with this chapter.











It also has a super cool special attack. Outside of that, there isn't much to this fight. It's weak to electricity and it alternates between that Blades attack and standard physical hits.

It can deal solid damage, but as long as you stay healed you should be fine. It isn't especially fast, so you won't have trouble keeping up with it. Its main strength is the 18k HP.



That might've gotten nasty on my own. I owe you, Valefor.



Oh, uh, you too, Lann and Reynn! Huh? Wait. Why did I thank two people who aren't even here? I'm weird.

No arguments there.



Ahhh ha ha ha ha!

You suck sooooo much. You'll get yours one day, Shantotto...



We get a memento as a reward, although we need to track down which Mirage can transfig into one of them. However, there is a DLC variant we can get right now (or you could have just caught it at the start of the game if you felt like it).



You need to reduce its HP to catch it, but it's only level 14, so if you do this later in the game you'll probably need a Mirage with the Subdue ability.

Einhänder and Astraea are references to the video game Einhänder that was released by Square in 1997. It was a side-scrolling shooter with 3D graphics. It was a pretty good game and well received, but Square sort of chucked it into the closet and hasn't gone looking for it since. This is one of the few references you'll ever see to it even existing. Astraea is one of the fighter models that can be unlocked in the game, although you had to beat Hard mode using only 3 continues.



Astraea also has an Agility++ Mirajewel on its Mirage Board, which I want. Its going in the lineup for a bit so I can get it.

Update 28 Highlights - Research


Moving on. We're checking in with Tometown to see how the Phantom Train situation is unfolding.

Hmm, still no luck, I fear. It gives new meaning to "random," I can tell you that much.

Ugh... Well, if you can't track it, we'll have to give up for now. A train that traverses the real and unreal... Just our luck. And it only shows itself when it's ready to attack. Not an honorable Mirage, is it?





That's what, Reynn?

We already know someone who runs a Mirage train!

Ummm... Oh, cactus guy!



Update 28 Highlights - Reynn Sucks


Hah! You certainly are fired up today now, aren't you? My little Jiant girl!

Um, Reynn? I know you're excited about this, but can I cut in?

Sure. Be my guest.

Conductor, if my sister beats you, how 'bout you promise to give us the blueprints to your train. Deal?

Oh, we're on. But that's a big "if" you're talking about!

Here I come!

Ha! Bring it!



Well, I knew it was going to come to this sooner or later. Of course Reynn is going to get her "revenge", don't even pretend like the writers weren't going to do that scene at some point for "laughs".

We'll see that Reynn's predictable victory will be completely unearned, though. Why do I say this?

Update 28 Highlights - Stupid Mini Game #2 (Failure attempt and Success Attempt)






Because this mini game is pure fucking luck. Cactuar Conductor poofs into one of four spots only for a split-second, too fast for most people to see and react to before he disappears.

The good news is that you can just skip this mini game, similar to skipping a cutscene. The story will just continue as normal. If you actually want to beat this mini game, then pretty much your only recourse is to pick a direction and just spam attacks while hoping that you just luck out and he teleports into the space just as you swing.



For an example of how bullshit this is, here I am hitting the attack button about 0.40 seconds after CC's smoke cloud appears.



And he dodges it. I'm honestly not even sure if choosing punch instead of a kick actually changes anything. It's not as though he appears high or low. There's no pattern to his movements. You just have to pray or possess precognition.

It takes me 4 retries in order to finally hit him.



No one's ever beat me...

Don't worry CC, Reynn didn't actually beat you in the sense she used skill or technique.



But of course she's going to celebrate as though what she just did wasn't pure luck and nothing more.

Uh, way to go, Rey--



And then she fucking slaps Lann! What the fuck, Reynn?!

Best, day, EVERRR!

I don't think I've ever seen her this happy before...

Need I remind you that CC beat Reynn four times in a row. Also, the two of you are fresh off of fucking the world over. This is not the time for Reynn to be jumping around squealing in joy and being proud. She even has an un-subtitled line that's like "Thanks for the warm up! Ha ha!"

Just a reminder that Reynn sucks.



Oh yeah! That's why we came here.

"Ha ha ha! People are dying because of us!"

Uh... dude...

Hmm... A phantom train, you say? Pshah! I'll drag that "loco"-motive into the real world.

Can you really do that?

Please. I've been a Mirage conductor for fifty years! Hooking one lousy train is gonna be a piece of cactus. So to speak.

Meanwhile, Cactaur Conductor continues to prove why he is best boy.

Great! We'll tell the League of S and Celes.

So that's the end of this quest. We now have access to Part 2, so let's finish up with that.

Update 28 Highlights - Phantom Train


Yes. We should be right on time. But I don't get it. How did they figure out where the Phantom Train will appear?

Beats me. They work in strange ways...

They didn't do shit.

...!

Bingo. Right on schedule.





For some reason, Phantom Train doesn't actually fight us. It just drops off this Death Machine variant and pisses off somewhere.



Ohhh yeah, another ghost trai-- NMPH?!

I can't heeear you!

You could have just covered your ears! ...Hey, what's that weird machinery coming out of it?

That train must the-be related to the Cogna somehow!

It's just a Cogna?! Oh, that's no big deal.

What are you talking about?!

Yeah, it's a huge the-deal!

HEY! Stop picking on me... Where's my agent? I'm leaving!

What the-- Sis? Where are you going? Come back! Hello? PLEASE?

Gotcha.

Whoa, for a second there I thought you really bailed.

She was the-considering it.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Grymoire...







So, War Machine. Also kind of a tough fight, although the same strategy will work as in the last fight. Like Death Machine, it has an attack called Full Output which can hit the entire party for about 1k.

Its physical attack isn't quite as impressive, but it does have Retaliatory Missile as a counter, so be careful with your health when attacking it as it could strike back and then follow it up with an attack of its own before you can heal.

But once again, it's a 2 on 1 fight, so as long as you have someone handling healing then you'll be fine.



Yes. That's right.

Celes. You've got skill. Why don't you join SeeD?

So this sounds a little strange, since Squall is part of the League of S in this game. Wouldn't he be trying to get her to join that? Squall has a part in his Who's Who entry which sheds some light on how the League came to be.

~The League of S~

Cloud and Shelke work for Shinra, and Squall and Quistis work for SeeD. When these two powerful groups joined forces against the Bahamutian Federation, they became a powerful alliance known as the League of S--which, as you've figured out by now, comes from the first letter of their names.


~The League's Troubled History~

Shinra and SeeD--their alliance poses a formidable threat to the Bahamutian Federation.
However, their cause saw a major setback when a mysterious incident at Shinra's former HQ in Nibelheim resulted in the disappearance of its researchers and top brass. After the incident, SeeD stepped in and assumed command of Shinra's mercenary group, known as SOLDIER. That is why Cloud and Shelke now report to Quistis.

So SeeD and SOLDIER are organizations in this game that joined together to form the League of S. Presumably they will go their separate ways once the Bahamutians are dealt with, which is why Squall is trying to recruit Celes to SeeD instead of the League.

Sorry. I've no intention of joining a group like that again.

It doesn't have to be a permanent arrangement. Think it over. We could use someone as tough as you.

I'll give it some thought. Anyway, did you notice? We weren't the only forces at play during that battle.

Hm? ...You're right. I thought it went down more easily than expected.



As will I.

And that's where we'll call it quits for now. Figaro is up next and Nibelheim is a multi-parter. Figaro also has something... irritating about it.



Before we go, you may have noticed that the stacks have changed again. I've pulled out a selection of our nicknamed Mirages to fill the lineup as well as a few special choices picked for their Mirajewels. I need to start prepping for end game, which means I won't be rotating out the Mirages as much as I've been doing so far. I will still swap out some Mirages if the thread latches on to them and gives them nicknames, but certain ones will be sticking around to make sure they are in ass kicking shape for end game.


Anyway, next time in the World of Final Fantasy SSLP:



FUUUUUUUUUUUU